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You'd need a heart of stone not to laugh


Result!! Bloody splendid.

On hols recently we called in to a (very twinky) cafe in Willingham (Cambs.), had a very nice meal, went to pay and found a little notice on the till, ‘we are cashless’. Imagine the fun we had! When we eventually left the 4 staff who had gathered around to argue the toss were all smiling because the cash we left with them included the tip (we nearly always tip). First tip they’d had for 2 years we reckoned. Have fun divvying that up we told them.

I grew up in Bath, you could drink that water for free from the fountain in Stall Street. An acquired taste mind. Now 50p a glass in the pump room (it only comes out of the ground at a million-odd litres a day so they need to ration it eh) As kids we swam in the stuff at the public swimming baths - just a normal swimming pool, can’t remember how much it cost but bugger-all because we were not well off. . . you couldn’t see from one side to the other for steam sometimes. That old pool has gone, now its £40-odd a session somewhere for posh twats.

So glad I left Bath for Bradford 56 years ago (glad I left Bradford 22 years ago too!) We’d leave this effing country altogether now if there were anywhere half decent to go. . .